This is Ilkley

How Things Got Very Awkward at One Ilkley Petrol Station

You wait all this time for an Ilkley petrol station to treat itself to a makeover and then two come along at once. Just as the Ben Rhydding Tesco Express prepares to reopen, the Jet garage on Leeds Road begins its transition to Texaco. However, things were more than a little awkward in this case, and we will all be able to relate.

Ilkley Petrol Station Soap Opera

They’ve removed the Jet-branded trim, the large sign is no more and it’s full steam ahead with the work. Did the Jet corporation see this coming, though? Let us look at the evidence:

This Ilkley Petrol Station Refit Was Too Awkward

We all know of friends who were perfectly content in relationships, maybe even dreaming of wedding bells and future offspring, only for their other half to suddenly reveal they’re bored and they’re going off with Terry from Sales instead. It’s like a soap opera plot and this picture makes it look like it’s happening on our patch. You need to look closer, though.

Jet Poster Shows Optimistic Future

Look at this official advertising poster for Jet. See how happy and positive they are about the relationship. They’re excited to talk about going “on the journey together”. They have big plans for the future; they probably want to introduce the garage to their parents, maybe they were considering combining their CD collections and getting a dog together. The partnership is solid, in their opinion.

However, what they don’t know yet is…

Sign Showing Jet Garage on Leeds Road is Becoming a Texaco

Brutal.

Presumably, when Jet come round to pick up their things (and drop off three hundred My Hermes parcels in a passive-aggressive attempt at revenge), the brand new, shiny Texaco-coupled garage will tell them “it’s not you, it’s us”. It’s a classic line.

Tesco Express Esso Renovation

You hear of lottery winners who hit the jackpot and then split up with their partner, thinking they can now do better elsewhere. Well, with the extra revenue from the five-week closure of the Tesco Express across the road, is that what happened here?

On a legal note, we’d have to say “absolutely categorically not and we are completely certain that they handled every part of this transition in a completely professional manner”. Thanks to This is Ilkley‘s lawyers for preparing that statement.

About Jim Coulson 36 Articles
I'm Jim, I live in Burley-in-Wharfedale with my wife, two kids and a dog. This leaves me at least ten minutes a week to write incisive web content.

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